Anger Management

I'm so mad. I can't even tell you exactly why or at what, but I'm mad. I'm angry. Frustrated. I don't know what to call it. If I could express it right now to you, it would be a long paragraph of expletives followed by a bunch of dots ......

That's basically how I feel.

I'm starting to think that the pain in my chest that I've had since Friday is related to this anger and this panic that I've been having. It's getting worse every day. I don't know what triggered it, but I'm on a steady decline here and I don't what to do. No, no I don't want o die, that's not what I'm saying. I've become very serious in the last two weeks. I haven't laughed in forever, nothing makes me smile, I feel like I've just grown into a lump of flesh who stares at screens all day and barely existing. It's taking its toll on my relationship now. I hate feeling like this. Every other word is a worry in my head. I worry about everything now. Everything. If my boyfriend is four minutes late I go into a angry tornado spin and suspect the worst. I feel like everyone is lying to me. No one is honest and I'm starting to wonder if I'm the one who's not being honest here.

I need to talk to someone. Preferably in English.